Sisters in a Fallen World: Longing for Godly Sisterhood
Being a woman is not easy. Being a Christian is not easy. And being a Christian woman is doubly hard. Women carry many roles, and each role comes with responsibilities unique to their situation.
If a woman is the caregiver of an aging parent, the daily duties look different depending on that parent’s needs. Caring for a parent with dementia is not the same as caring for a parent with diabetes or one recovering from hip surgery.
If a woman is a mother, her responsibilities look different depending on her child’s needs. A mother of a child with autism faces challenges different from a mother of a child with ADHD. Add to that children entering hormonal changes, or the mother of a child with a rare genetic disorder who may never experience puberty - each situation creates a distinct burden.
A woman who is a wife carries responsibilities that differ even among wives. The wife of a retired veteran with PTSD faces a different reality from the wife of a man with a chauvinistic view of marriage.
So, although women may share the titles of caregiver, mother, or wife, the weight of those roles varies greatly depending on our circumstances. This means that even when we meet other women whose roles seem similar, our lived experiences may be very different. At best, we may find a few sisters with whom we share a few things in common, but rarely everything. And because of this, women often feel left out, isolated, or alone. Many feel like they are suffering in silence, not wanting to burden anyone else - especially knowing that every woman carries her own challenges.
There is nothing worse than feeling you have no one to confide in.
Recently, I have felt that way. I found myself praying that God would give me a close friend like David and Jonathan had (1 Samuel 18:1). Scripture says, “There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother” (Proverbs 18:24), and I longed for that type of bond with another Sister in Christ.
But many women are guarded. Some fear that people want to get close for the wrong reasons. Others have been deeply hurt and never want to experience that hurt again. Still others are simply overwhelmed and do not know how to open their hearts.
So I prayed for that sister who could encourage me in the Word when I am down, who could sit and listen without judgment when I’m not in a good space, who could gently - and if necessary, sharply - rebuke me (2 Timothy 3:16), and who would be invested in my spiritual development.
I thank God for my husband - my confidant who encourages, rebukes when needed, listens, and does not judge. But I would be lying if I said I did not desire that same connection with a Sister in Christ.
The truth is, we may never experience that perfect unity and sisterhood here in this fallen, cursed world (Genesis 3). Scripture warns us not to “trust in man, whose breath is in his nostrils” (Isaiah 2:22). Even with the best intentions, we will fail one another at times. Even the Apostle Paul and Barnabas - two mighty men of God - had a sharp disagreement and parted ways (Acts 15:39).
So, in the meantime, I am becoming the change I want to see. I am allowing the Holy Spirit to transform me and sanctify me for that level of sisterhood (2 Corinthians 3:18; John 17:17).
And I hold onto our blessed hope: that one glorious day, when Christ returns to restore all things (Revelation 21:1–5), our unity will be complete. The new heavens and new earth will be filled with sisters who, as Paul charged, “think the same thing” and are of one mind (Philippians 2:2). Sisters who seek the good of one another above themselves (Philippians 2:3–4). Sisters who strive for the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace (Ephesians 4:3).
Until that day, we do not give up on each other. We keep striving. We keep praying. And we allow the Holy Spirit to give us a foretaste of what eternity with our Sisters in Christ will feel like.
After all, Jesus said, “By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:35).